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Bahubali! A trick by the RSS?

“WHY DID KATTAPPA KILL BAHUBALI?” This was a burning question in the year that went past us. Much more burning and invoking than ‘The Newshour’ by Arnab Goswami. I wonder why did Arnab not ask this question when he had the chance.

Anyways, I suggest Mr. S.S Rajamouli should be awarded with Nobel Peace Prize for finally revealing why did Kattappa kill Bahubali. There were instances of lovers breaking up, peddlers getting killed, muslims joining ISIS, all because they couldn’t find the key to the mystery. Some people believe that Salman Khan’s ‘Hit & Run’ case of 2002 was the aftermath of this question. It is said that Salman went into the future to see Bahubali that day. He did love the film but was so overwhelmed by the Kattappa suspense that he ran his car over the pedestrians (So sorry! I meant the driver).

Let’s leave it be because he got acquitted at the end of the day, giving us another chance to watch his super logical films, which probably surpasses the abilities of Christopher Nolan.

Yesterday, second installment of this epic movie by Rajamouli was released. Finally, the answer to the question was served for the price of a silver platter. But was this question the end of Bahubali? Isn’t there anymore question to this franchise? Is this all we get after 2 years? If you think yes, then I beg to differ! This answer gave birth to another question and that is “Was Bahubali a trick played by RSS?”

Before we get into this question, let me tell you something about the RSS. RSS is an institution which serves to the Indian people, teach them the Indian history, vedic ways of our culture and much more. RSS is often blamed for ‘Hindu Terrorism/Saffronisation/Communalism’ by the Left Liberals who support the students at JNU for chanting Anti-India slogans as Freedom of Expression.

Now you must be thinking how did it strike me that RSS can be involved in the making of Bahubali! No it didn’t! I overheard a conversation of two Left Liberals in the Delhi Metro (Don’t blame me of snooping and eavesdropping! They were too loud while exercising their right of FoE). I recall, I heard them say why wasn’t Bahubali a muslim character in the film? (afterall, all the Bahubalis around the world are Muslims like Baghdadi, Dawood, Al-Jawahiri, Owaisi, Mulayam Singh etc)

I wanted to stop them right there for spreading minority complex in the minority community but I didn’t (afterall they chant inclusiveness all day long). I wanted to know how Left Liberals looked and sounded like after they log off from their social media accounts. I kept to their conversation and it went as

A – Not only should he be a Muslim character but also the fact that he got betrayed by his countryman. It makes perfect sense.

B – Yes. You are absolutely right. You know I think that RSS was a part of this movie, both parts!

A – How? What did you notice? You must have analysed I am sure. These Sanghis leave clues everywhere.

B – Firstly, remember how Kattappa insults the Muslims(sic) by not accepting the sword they offered and then furthermore breaks it into two halves in a duel. Such disrespect I tell you..! Only Sanghis can think of such demeaning tricks.

A – Wow man! I never thought of it. We can use it on the social media to show their real colours. The degenerate communalists that they are.

B – This isn’t just it! Why was the queen called ‘Ma’ and not ‘Ammi’ ? Ammi means the same thing. They could have easily taken the word, but no, how can the RSS survive if Muslims prosper!

A – OMG! Dude you are a legend. How do you do this kind of in depth analysis? Pretty intense huh!

B – I haven’t seen Bahubali 2 yet. Just wait and watch. I will bring out the hypocrisy of these Sanghis.

A – I heard that in the second part, the role of Tammanna Bhatia has been decreased.

B – Why wouldn’t it be man? These saffron agents can’t see our women getting empowered. They are the owners of patriarchy.

A – I think you are right. RSS must have had an influence in the movie. After all they don’t like lovers roaming around and the Kattappa suspense was a reason for many breakups in our country like Arbaaz and Malaika, maybe.

B – See! Now you get it. Arbaaz and Malaika. Hindu Muslim pair, sanghis call it love jihad. They were the reason why this beautiful couple broke up.

Hearing this, an elderly man interrupted their ‘RSS analogy’ session and said, “You damned souls! Read the newspaper already! Stop acting like your stupid leaders. You have to bear the burden of this nation’s heritage and sovereignty. First you blamed Modi, then Yogi of being communal and intolerant towards the Muslims. Don’t you know about the Gorakhnath Temple operated by Yogi? Don’t you know who heads the cattle of Yogi? Such moronic youth this generation has become. How can you call someone names when you can’t even know little facts. If you will turn out to be this stupid then who will stop this nation from becoming another hotspot for terrorism to grow?”

My thoughts were hijacked by this man’s sheer words. I almost forgot the stupid things that I just heard from the two gentlemen standing next to me. I was happy for the moment. But then, happiness doesn’t last long. It was my stop to de-board. As I managed to pass through the crowd, I managed to hear a familiar voice say, “These RSS crooks……”

The Left liberals were off to analysis, again.

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