It’s been barely over a month since Hindu Nationalist Narendra Modi returned to power with a bigger majority and most parts of India are reporting that mangoes – supposed to be the King among fruits – have started changing their colour from green to orange, which is a shade of saffron i.e. the colour of Hinduism.
Intellectuals and activists from across the country have expressed concern over this saffronisation of a popular fruit. Activists have refused to believe that this phenomenon can be explained through natural evolution, which some botanists term as “ripening” of the fruit.
“Science has often been used by the Right Wing to hide their bigotry. There is nothing ripening here. It’s India getting rotten to the core,” claimed intellectual Mahua Guha, who has become a leading intellectual over the last 72 hours.
“Is Indian team also getting ripened as their jerseys turn saffron from blue?” Mahua shot back showing middle finger when a failed journalist pointed out that ripening could indeed be the cause of this change in colour of mangoes.
Activists and intellectuals point out that their favourite fruit – Strawberry, which is something not enjoyed by classless Right Wing that mocks it as Lutyens berry – remains red steadfastly and never turns saffron, thus any claim that saffronisation is a natural evolution is illogical and unscientific. They also point out that India is a multicultural society and thus what is good for mangoes many not be good for other fruits.
“It is your savarna privilege and bias if you think all Indians like mangoes,” local detective turned international journalist Amrood Ayyub pointed out, “Have you not seen that mangoes hardly are crucial part of a Muslim diet. Muslims actually prefer dry fruits like dates. Wondered why ‘dry’ fruits? Because the Brahminical capitalist government of India takes away all the juices for savarnas.”
Convinced with such arguments of activists, the Congress party too has come out against mangoes turning saffron.
“We can’t ignore that this is happening after Narendra Modi said that he liked mangoes in an interview with Akshay Kumar,” Congress leader Swara Bhaskaran pointed out. The party has decided to not allow the parliament to function till the mangoes turn green again. The party had earlier opposed Indian team wearing orange jersey for their world cup match against England.
Meanwhile media reports coming in at the time of publication of this report suggest that a person in West Bengal has been forced to eat mangoes and shout “Jai Ho Aam”. The incident is expected to cause nationwide outrage.
Alter ego of RR