The Secular Council of India decrees Modi a dangerous man! Here’s why

The Endless Pursuit of getting our detractors (to sound politically correct we would simply call them right wing guys, personally we prefer the term “Hindu Extremists” as quoted by a reasonably popular actress, very recently in her interview post her marriage) to yield to the common narrative and abide by the secular guidelines set forth by the Secular Council of India, is yielding no results.

In view of the above, it has been decreed by the High Council that we will discredit their entire ilk so that we can have our way and set the narrative for people to see things the way we want them to see it.

Today we have successfully managed to do that, thanks to our External Affairs Ministry who gave us the much-needed ammo to put the ‘right-wing people’ in place. We have support pouring in from all unexpected corners, even the Indira National Congress, who put out twitter polls asking if the current EAM minister was the worst amongst all till date; the ones that had asked for her resignation over the way she handled the Iraq issue citing she acted inappropriately, lied deliberately and hoodwinked the people have come out in support of her.

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This is unprecedented, and this is exactly what we wanted. We want all like-minded (‘Like-minded’ is a typo, please read as ‘Anti BJP/RSS, Modi Haters’) people who believe in the secular fabric and democratic garments of this country to come together in our fight against the ones who have made our lives miserable.

To begin with, you must all understand that this ‘Secular Council of India’ considers Modi to be a larger threat because he talks of an India where we the councilmen would look like a bunch of fools being rendered obsolete and irrelevant to the idea of India he proposes.

He talks of an India where our fellow councilmen who today are celebrated journalists, ones who carved their career being footsies of the then subsequent Congress governments, peddling lies as truths and truths as lies, are no longer considered honest or worthy of being called as Journalists and no longer guardians of the fourth pillar of a democracy

Does he talk of a Congress Mukth Bharat, the only NGO/Industry that has kept the kitchen fires in our houses burning, how many of us would be rendered jobless if this becomes a reality? He talks of a “Make in India” to create jobs while he takes away ours and threatens to destroy the only industry that employs us.

He talks of an India where unworthy SM trolls call out our lies and hypocrisy at the drop of a hat. Damn Bambani for making internet competitive where the Airtel’s and Vodaphone’s had to drop prices to stay in the race. Today even a common man has access to the internet and can voice his opinion, and if we the ones whom once the country looked up to for information are discredited by ordinary people on social media who bust our fallacies in seconds, imagine what a fall from grace. Who are we to take that smack across our faces?

So we won’t spare any effort, won’t hesitate to bring forth any resources to bring this ecosystem down, the ones that simply threaten our very existence.

We are not one, we are legion. We will not hesitate to tarnish the very ecosystem that he draws his strength from. We will create disrepute to anyone that stands by him; we not let even the smallest opportunity to slip by. When there is none we will create one. By now you have seen that we have mastered the art of conjuring controversy from even non-controversial ones.

And for the benefit of people who are not well informed about the common narrative, I have listed them down for you:

Narendra Modi is our enemy. With him, we have no future. We explain here why!

1. Junket trips are free rides!

Our junket trips and free rides at the expense of the state have come to an end. He’s a selfish guy who travels alone with only the staff required for him to perform his duty, we ask will it cost an extra penny, on account of Air Fuel to carry us on the Air India One.

Moreover, our trips and our expenses there at the destination countries would be covered well and taken care of by our patrons whom we glorify, glamorize and make larger than life. For example, we made Rahul Ghandy look like some tall leader, that the world has been waiting for since Obama demitted office.

Don’t we deserve to be rewarded for such Mission Impossible Assignments? Didn’t we make Ramya who probably have never even touched her computer other than for Facebook and entertainment look like some Master Strategist compared to her counterpart who probably knows more about computers and how things work in the SM.? He – MODI has denied us, citizens of this country, a free ride on Air India one which we were entitled to so far. After all, these are the perks of the Job

2. We are becoming irrelevant!

Is that all – No! This man single-handedly has rendered us so irrelevant that we are now forced to make our own stories, sometimes we make one when there is none. Those were the times when we had first-hand information even before official press conferences were called in by the then ministers.

Some of us were even involved in the decision making of who should be ministers and that was the level of powers we wielded and we walked freely in the corridors of power. Today we beg him for a press conference this man pretends like we don’t exist. At this rate, journalists will become an endangered species in this country

3. Damn Social Media!

The misery continues. If this is not enough this man wields so much clout over social media that his colleagues have followed in his footsteps and have tried to establish people connect, and sadly some of them are good at it. Where does that put us? Already our noted colleagues have gone off to set up independent media outlets because it has become difficult to keep us paid, and our sources of revenues have dried up. Who would feed our beer bellies and our luxurious lifestyles?

4. What about our books?

Some of us are reduced to writing books and make a living writing books, do you know how difficult it is to sell books in such hostile environments after all most of the masses we have branded them as uneducated, uncouth Hindu Extremists, we are forced to sell our books to our own folks, sometimes we give them for free at Literary fests that we conduct to honor ourselves.

If none of this convinces you that this man Narendra Modi is a threat to us, then “I” by the powers vested in me by the Secular Council of India declare you all Right Wing Trolls

By the way, we will claim we got death threats from anyone that even dares to counter this article. We will write to all the press councils including the one we plan to establish in the Secular Republic of Mars. The Martians have already promised us a  show of solidarity saying they will play victims stating that Right Wing aka “Hindu Extremists” used vaporizers on them.

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