Alka Lamba is born for drama. If there is one great example of how some individuals just land in the wrong profession and keep getting confused all their life it is her. Here is a woman, so good at saas-bahu level drama that she keeps calling a camera crew to catch her dramatic performances and keeps releasing the photographs and videos on social media. But such is the tragedy of a dramatic life that she neither gets an invitation from Big Boss nor gets taken seriously by her political bosses.
People just ignore her like bored sports fans watch expressionless towards the TV when their moms take control of the remote and put Pyar Ke Do Panchhi, Sasural Simran Ka or any one of those soap operas that sound like lines from old movies.
In the latest stunt, Lamba has shared a two-year-old video where she is calling PM Modi and UP CM Yogi Adityanath as “Napunsak” (impotent). She was probably expecting shocked reactions from across the political spectrum, probably a good pat in the back from the Gandhi family, or a regretful pang in the heart from her previous bosses in AAP, on having lost such a superstar, but no such serial-level drama is on sight.
Watch “Alka Lamba ने कहा, Modi-Yogi तुम्हारे मुंह पर थूकती हूं, तुम दोनों नपुंसक हो” on YouTube https://t.co/Oahedp7Q7l— Alka Lamba India 🇮🇳🙏 (@LambaAlka) May 24, 2020
In the video, Lamba is giving one of her peak performances that can put Dolly Bindra and Rakhi Sawant to shame. She is wearing a delicate shade of pink, the video is professionally shot and edited, with key scenes repeated thrice as they do in serials when the gareeb Bahu shatters the fancy tea set and the rich Sasural reacts like they have lost all their wealth.
Lamba has shared the vide with a sensational headline. “Modi and Yogi you are Napunsaks and I spit on them.” When you open the video out of curiosity, u find a visibly outraged Alka using all her energy to spew venom. The quivering of the lips, the pauses at strategic intervals and pink dupatta and the batting of the carefully made eyelashes, all the basic ingredients of a peak saas-bahu drama are right there.
When you pay attention to her words, then you realise that something is amiss. She is actually talking about the Unnao rape case of 2018. If you are wondering what about the Sengar case riled up Lamba now, it is nothing. Since the political activities around Lamba’s life have been rather dull, she had probably asked her video guys to re-dramatise her two-year-old video and re-released it on Twitter, for what reasons, you can take a guess.
Here is a screengrab of the two-year-old video, where the special effects and styles have been a bit different. Instead of dramatic lines repeating twice of thrice, we have an angry Lamba staring at us with her eyeliner-loaded eyes.
The content of the video is just cheap political foul-mouthing. Lamba says “had CM Yogi been married he would have probably learned how to respect a woman, if he had been blessed with a daughter, he would have known the pain a father feels when that daughter is raped”. She used similar lines for PM Modi too.
It is not clear why exactly Lamba thinks that unmarried men cannot respect women or why she has the idea that married men who have a daughter can never hurt anyone. But then, Lamba is Lamba.
Unnao rape convict Kuldeep Sengar was arrested, expelled from BJP and was eventually convicted of the rape and was sentenced to life imprisonment by the court.
Drama over ‘quitting AAP’
Last year, Lamba had finally quit AAP, months after repeatedly threatening to quit AAP, after other AAP leaders made it clear a number of times that she should quit, and they are ready to accept her resignation even on Twitter.
Before finally quitting, Lamba had tweeted, stated and given statements that she intends to quit over a dozen times, probably hoping that some AAP leader will give some attention and request her not to quit. On the contrary, all she managed to get was a response from AAP’s Saurabh Bharadwaj that the party will accept her resignation even on Twitter.
She has announced this a dozen of times in the past. It takes 1 min to send a written resignation letter to party leadership. We will accept it on Twitter too. https://t.co/dDEiZmbtf6— Saurabh Bharadwaj (@Saurabh_MLAgk) August 4, 2019
Drama over ‘Syrian Children’
In 2017, Lamba had suddenly realised that there are suffering children in Syria. She had called her photographers, had got ready, and taken some photos that were intended to capture not the plight of Syrian children, but how Alka Lamba looks while feeling sadness over Syrian children.
The series of photos that Lamba had shared while tagging the UN were like this:
- Lamba’s finger pointing at a TV screen that was showing some programme about Syria.
- A close-up shot of Lamba highlighting her eyeliner-loaded eyes that were trying a lot to look watery over the supposed sadness she felt about Syria.
- Another close-up shot showing Lamba sniffling, touching a carefully manicured hand with a massive Shiney ring, evidently trying to console herself because of the apparent sadness she felt.
- Finally another photo of the TV screen.
She had even taken the precautions to have a picture clicked at the precise moment when a teardrop was precariously hanging from her upper lip.
Foul language and insensitivity
Lamba probably knows that apart from drama, an entry into the Big Boss house would require considerable usage of foul language, insensitivity, and a penchant to jump seek catfights over blown up issues.
She has been practising all those moves in her ‘political’ career. She had once climbed on top of a fire rescue ladder to pose for photographs during a fire in Chandni Chowk, her former constituency.
Lamba had even used former defence minister Manohar Parrikar’s battle with cancer to share crass, insensitive remarks. She had dragged the Rafale deal, the failed trope by Congress to target the 2014-19 Modi government that eventually blasted on Congress’ own face, to insinuate that Parrikar’s illness may be an outcome of his ‘dishonesty’.
Recently, she went on a deranged rant against Olympic medallist Yogeshwar Dutt, when her foul words against the RSS were called out by the wrestler-turned BJP leader, Lamba has resorted to using foul, crass words about Dutt’s parents. Dutt had stated that he foul words only show Lamba’s own standard.
It is indeed ironic that Lamba, who has today shared an old video claiming to be outraged over the harassment of women, had jumped to target Dutt’s mother, using foul words question her character, just to placate her political ego.
But then, Lamba probably lives inside a world of her own, where she is constantly auditioning for an entry into the Big Boss house.