Home Opinions Dear Deepika, Is it just #mychoice? - An Open Letter from a woman

Dear Deepika, Is it just #mychoice? – An Open Letter from a woman

Dear Deepika Padukone,

First of all, thank you so much for the effort. Despite your tight schedule due to your upcoming film (quite a funny coincidence), you had the time to stand up for a social cause.

I watched your film/video today and found it depressing. It’s your choice to wear the clothes you like, you say. I would have been so happy to see a woman wearing a Saree or a Hijab saying it is her choice to wear them. I have personally met young women who choose these because they like it. Why were the traditional outfits not presented as an alternative choice? Or was it just assumed that if one is traditional then it is not their choice? Doesn’t it give a horribly wrong impression that being traditional is being oppressed? Doesn’t it make all these women feel inferior?

- Ad - - article resumes -

Next comes the most contradicting part of the video. You say it is your choice to have sex outside of marriage. It sure is. More than being a choice, it is adultery. But the question is, why marry someone with such desires in the first place? Have you forgotten the way you accused someone of not being loyal to you (in a relationship) and how you ended up getting hurt? Also, since when did the marriage just meant sex or confined to one’s choice? When it is just about one, then the other one disappears. Oh by the way, how subtly the saree girl comes at this part with a naughty smile when you say sex before marriage. Some dumb stereotyping here. To love temporarily or to lust forever is your choice. It is my choice here to not comment its consequence on your relationship.

To have a baby or not is your choice. Do you seriously believe that you can possibly have a baby with no man involved? Also, if you are talking about a baby while you are in a relationship isn’t it being sensible to ask the other person too? What if he surprises you by saying he would love to be a part of it?

The women community is not just focused on the choices which are described here. All are not privileged enough to have these choices in the first place. There are many genuine issues like education, health which need priority over these. It may surprise you (since it is not considered in the film) that a woman could be an obstacle for another woman. There are several such instances where the women from the so-called modern class have trouble in accepting the lower class women or sometimes just the traditional women. There are many incidents where the English speaking women looking down upon the native language speaking women. I have personally met women from different countries like Italy, France, Germany, Iran, China and Srilanka. Some of them have trouble speaking impeccable English (the way a modern woman like you speaks) and they are all more comfortable with their native languages. While we respect their individuality, don’t you think a woman who only speaks Kannada or Punjabi or Bhojpuri also deserves the same respect? In the name of breaking Stereotype of the traditional mind-set, an equally stupid stereotyping is growing at the other end. Unless we accept and respect every woman, irrespective of their background, social status or education, how can we stand united against other discrimination?

Finally and most importantly, why is feminism generally related to being anti-men? Yes, many sufferings of women are influenced by men. But that never justifies blaming all men every time for every misfortune. For every such incident that has happened, there are many men who have spoken against it and have tried to do their part to make the world a better place. In addition, I personally know many men who sincerely follow and celebrate uplifting of women in their everyday lives more than the other women around. My mother, who has a rural background, was the first woman to hold a professional degree in her village. My dad’s support and encouragement which helped her to become the principal of a school eventually is no less a contribution. His efforts have extended to his children thereby never differentiating me and my brother. In fact I can even proudly say that I always had an advantage over my brother which stays true even to this day. Daddys’ are partial to daughters you see.

You too have acknowledged the support you received from your father during the release of the same video. By simply branding all men as the root cause for every issue, or portraying them like they are the enemies, aren’t you insulting all such men who are genuinely working towards women empowerment? Don’t you think that not mentioning the positive role of a man in a woman’s life is the biggest blunder in the video? Being modern does not mean being selfish and definitely not to the extent of opposing the other gender altogether. Modernity need not have to do anything with appearance either. It is being able to address the problems with a new perception. As a woman, I do have limitations and likewise there are limitations associated with a man. Accepting a limitation will only make you and me stronger. My best wishes for your upcoming film. Hope it wins many hearts.

– A proud woman

by @veena_ps

Help Opindia Reach Every Indian. Share This Post
We need your support to survive in the media industry. Please consider paying us for the content we produce:

To know more about these payments, please click here.


Big Story

While slamming Rahul Gandhi and praising the Narendra Modi government for abrogating Article 370, Iqbal Ansari said the government has established the rule of a law in the country by removing Article 370.

2019 World Cup Is Here!

Catch the latest on Cricket World Cup as it unfolds, special coverage by Opindia

To Advertise on Opindia.com Click here

Ravish Kumar blames ‘Modi the dictator’ for people not wanting to watch his mediocre shows anymore

The curious case of journalism by Ravish Kumar is that he often resorts to shooting the allegations in the dark without backing with any hard evidence,

Parody country Pakistan’s ex-minister Rehman Malik exposes his low IQ, falls for a parody account who fools him like a pro

Ever since India abolished Article 370 from its constitution, Pakistani politicians including Pakistan PM Imran Khan are having a hard time digesting the fact that India has decidedly altered the status quo in Jammu and Kashmir.

Congress mouthpiece’s obituary on Arun Jaitley is the worst in recent memory and an absolute disgrace

The entire National Herald obituary is made up of thoughtless remarks.

Pakistan uses India Today journalist who created a drama at Srinagar airport to show India in bad light

The theatric by India Today journalist Mausami Singh at Srinagar airport is being used by a desperate Pakistan to further their own narrative about Kashmir.

Abusive ‘journalist’ Swati Chaturvedi spreads fake news, tweets photoshopped image of PM Modi wearing Arabic attire

Swati Chaturvedi, abusive troll masquerading as a journalist, has yet again been caught red-handed after propagating fake news.

Babri Masjid litigant Iqbal Ansari slams Rahul Gandhi: Modi govt right in abrogating Article 370, visit PoK and ‘resolve issues’ instead

While slamming Rahul Gandhi and praising the Narendra Modi government for abrogating Article 370, Iqbal Ansari said the government has established the rule of a law in the country by removing Article 370.

Pakistan Senate chairman cancels UAE trip after PM Modi is honoured with ‘Order of Zayed’ and ‘The King Hamad Order of the Renaissance’

Pakistan Senator decided to skip its pre-scheduled trip to the United Arab Emirates (UAE) following PM Narendra Modi recent visit to the nation where he was honoured with ‘Order of Zayed’ and 'The King Hamad Order of the Renaissance'

India Today journalist plays victim after being accosted by security personnel for video recording at Defence airport in Srinagar

Journalist Mausami Singh from India Today went berserk when a security personnel informed her shooting videos on Srinagar airport is prohibited

Vyapam ‘whistleblower’ and Congress sympathiser doctor publishes confidential medical report to falsely malign Baba Ramdev’s associate

Congress sympathiser doctor accused that Baba Ramdev's associate consumes cannabis using medical report of someone else
Pakistani Army's official spokesperson now begs attention from Shah Rukh Khan

Frustrated Pakistani Army now wants Shah Rukh Khan to pay attention to them

Major General Asif Ghafoor, the official spokesperson of the Pakistani armed forces, who thinks it is his patriotic and religious duty to be a Twitter troll, has now directed his ranting towards Shah Rukh Khan and his upcoming Netflix series.
Subscribe to Day's Top Stories
[newsletter_form type="minimal"]
- Advertisment -

Latest articles

Connect with us

181,492FansLike
173,593FollowersFollow
91,672SubscribersSubscribe
Help Opindia Reach Every Indian. Share This Post