Rahul Gandhi is like the Johnny Lever of Indian politics who acts as comic relief during high political drama

Well, at least the clown prince has moved on from scattering the country with mobile phone factories to 'spread the net of food manufacturing units' in Rajasthan.

Rahul Gandhi is precious. The Tweedledee of Indian politics (Tweedledum being AAP chief Arvind Kejriwal) while addressing a rally in Rajasthan’s Chittorgarh on Saturday threw a volley of ideas to help the farmers.

Rahul Gandhi starts off with his favourite lie that Prime Minister Modi has ‘waived off’ loans of ‘his rich industrial friends’. He said between the fifteen of them, total amount ‘waived off’ is Rs. 3.5 lakh crore. As we had said the amount of loan ‘waived off’ varies with every election rally, seems like it now varies in reverse proportion to the number of elections Congress has won since Rahul Gandhi was crowned the party president.

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It started off as Rs. 1.1 lakh crore loan in November 2016, became Rs. 1.3 lakh crore during Gujarat elections last year and conjured up Rs. 2.5 lakh crore during Karnataka elections held in May this year. Now, inexplicably the figure stands at Rs. 3.5 lakh crore. Perhaps former economist Prime Minister Dr Manmohan Singh could explain the magic behind the math of the beautiful mind that Rahul Gandhi is.

He shares an anecdote where he met the Prime Minister at his office and requested to ‘waive off’ the loans as he has done with his ‘friends’. ‘Modiji stared down at me and wondered who is this fellow talking about farmers loans?’ narrated Rahul. Rahul’s logic had left the Prime Minister speechless. Honestly, if I were the Prime Minister, even I wouldn’t have words to politely tell Rahul Gandhi to go and understand the difference between loan waived and loan written off. Maybe he should spend some time with former economist prime minister instead of businessmen relatives.

Well, at least the clown prince has moved on from scattering the country with mobile phone factories to ‘spread the net of food manufacturing units’ in Rajasthan.

Rahul Gandhi, Mad(e) in India!

Moving on, son of the soil, Rahul Gandhi has devised a brilliant plan to help Rajasthan’s farmers. They grow different things in different parts of the state. So Gandhi, perhaps having taken business lessons from his part-farmer, part-businessman brother-in-law has promised that if voted to power, ‘food processing factories’ would be set up right next to their farms. And this time it will not just be potato chips. There will be a tomato ketchup-making factory next to where farmers grow tomatoes, potato chips next to potato farms, soya bean oil factory next to soya bean farms and mirchi ka achar factory next to farms which grow chillies.

Makes one wonder if he gets his speech vetted by anyone with basic common sense or does he make up things as an improv comedy show.

Demonisation

He then invokes demonetisation. He says that Modi took money from poor people (during demonetisation) and gave it to his industrial friends. Gandhi says only the poor were standing in the queues at banks and ATMs during demonetisation, not the rich people. He picks up a person, a young boy Abhishek, from the audience and builds up anecdotes around him. That the money saved by people like parents of the young boy has gone to the pockets of the rich like Nirav Modi.

He mentions how Abhishek’s parents had to stand in the queue during demonetisation because his parents, like Vijay Mallya, who met Finance Minister Arun Jaitley in corridor using his privilege as Rajya Sabha member, could not meet Jaitley. Jaitley had denied any scheduled meetings with Mallya for any ‘settlements’. But one wonders if meeting the person accused of financial fraud makes one guilty, then that makes everyone who meets Congress President Rahul Gandhi and his mother Sonia Gandhi guilty of financial fraud, considering they both are out on bail in the National Herald scam.

And if all this was not enough, in a stroke of genius, Rahul Gandhi explains that if Congress comes to power in Rajasthan, the farmers can go and sell their produce at a medicine factory.

Don’t miss the cackle towards the end.

As if potato factory and mobile phones factories across the country were not enough, Congress President now wants farmers to sell their produce at something called ‘dawai banane wali factory‘.

Rahul Gandhi’s inane comments just show how far from reality he is. That how privileged his upbringing has been that he is far away from the practical aspects of life. That he does not know how laughable his elitist ‘solutions’ to problems are.

With less than six months to general elections, where Rahul Gandhi is vying for the top post, along with others in the opposition who are giving him a tough competition, the Congress President’s surely set to give us some comic relief. Rahul Gandhi could be the Johnny Lever in the drama that Indian politics is.

Politically incorrect. Author, Flawed But Fabulous.

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