Tuesday, May 18, 2021
Home Social Media How I dealt with Sexual Harassment on Twitter

How I dealt with Sexual Harassment on Twitter

– by Priya Raju

It was a sad day in Tamil Nadu. The Chief Minister, the iconic Amma Jayalalitha Jayaram had died the previous night. Schools and colleges were closed and there was virtually no traffic in Chennai.

My maids and cook called me at 6 AM to say they boarded a share auto to come to work, but they were asked to get down and go back home. Shops were closed, perhaps as a mark of respect or to prevent untoward incidents in a city where emotions were running high. There was no milk delivery. I tweeted about what I viewed as an inconvenience – no buses, household help, autos or milk

And that opened the floodgates of abuse!

Much of it was class envy and male chauvinism. “Why don’t you cook for a day, you lazy woman?”, “Sweep & wash the floors today”, “Chilra!” (Cheap) “Echa” (Lickspittle), “Half Boil” (gutter slang for “Woman” in the Tamil twitter world) and the handy “Munda!” (Widow) were hurled at me. I thought they were plumbing the depths of misogyny with the last 2 curses. But there was more to come.

There’s an infamous comedy scene of actor Vadivelu, where he talks to a prospective bride. The “joke” is about the promiscuity of that girl, who has sex with everyone – including the gardener. I got a tweet with a picture of this scene (which every Tamil speaker recognizes) asking me “Has the gardener come, girl?” Another person asked me if my hands were so tired from servicing my male-servants. He went on to ask his male contacts if any of them cared to pay me a “visit”.

I’ll give you a few seconds to digest that. I can shrug off rudeness and trolling, but this was sexual harassment, plain and simple. You can’t spin it any other way. I decided to take action.

I reported the tweets to Twitter. They locked the 1st account, but they thought the 2nd set of tweets “wasn’t a policy violation”. My jaw hit the floor when I read that response. What would constitute a flagrant policy violation then, a gang rape?

In the meantime, the abuser whose account had been locked by twitter deleted the offensive tweet and tweeted to me. “Danke” (Thank you) he tweeted in German. “Ach, Bitte! “(Oh, Please!), I told myself. He’s utterly remorseless. Something snapped in me. I had to silence the cackling hyenas. I owed it to every single woman on social media, to our #Sisterhood.

I spoke to @Prajnya, an amazing group of people committed to ending gender discrimination and sexual harassment. Prajnya roped in Dr Debarati Haider, who runs the very excellent cybervictims.org.

With them and my husband supporting me, I calculated that I had nothing to lose. I had nothing to be ashamed of. My abusers were feeding off my silence and I could not abide by that.

I plunged headfirst into social media – and I named and shamed them. The torrent of moral support I received from people was nothing short of amazing. Complete strangers were expressing solidarity with me. I felt deeply grateful for all the kindness. Every voice raised against the treatment meted out to me was a voice against online sexual harassment.

And then? Abuser #2 deleted his account. Abuser #1 issued a lame-ass apology that I had “misconstrued his innocent remarks”. If you are a Tamil speaker, you will know that the punch line of that comedy scene is about the girl having a go with the gardener. If you have seen the clip, you will also know that there is absolutely no innocent way to construe his tweet. He continued to protest his innocence and went on to lock his account.

Some of their friends started trolling me, but I didn’t care. I had something elusive – I had peace. They thought they were shaming me, but in reality, I had shamed them.

Sexual harassment is so easy online, because seriously – what are the consequences? And the culprits are emboldened because often we choose to keep silent. This silence is seen as a victory by them, who think they shamed us. And that is why it is important to speak up and to act.

(Priya Raju is an engineer and an entrepreneur who lives in Chennai)

  Support Us  

Whether NDTV or 'The Wire', they never have to worry about funds. In name of saving democracy, they get money from various sources. We need your support to fight them. Please contribute whatever you can afford

Related Articles

Trending now

Congress toolkit says party blocked beds in ‘friendly’ hospitals amidst COVID-19 crisis to paint itself as a messiah on social media

Social media is awash with a new toolkit, allegedly created by the Congress party, detailing its plan to extract political mileage.

Congress toolkit exposes nexus between the party and international media, used journalists to peddle anti-Modi propaganda

A new Congress toolkit is circulating on social media that reveals the depths to which the party sank during the pandemic.

Congress cries foul as its bombshell ‘toolkit’ stands exposed, threatens to take legal action

AICC Chairman in a Tweet threatened that a case is being filed against BJP leaders JP Nadda and Sambit Patra for forgery.

Latest Congress toolkit: Paint Kumbh as Covid superspreader, and Eid as ‘happy gathering’. Here are the details

From maligning Kumbh to attacking Prime Minister Narendra Modi for the Central Vista project, working with 'friendly' journalists to get 'tailored' articles defaming India and Modi govt, here is what the Congress 'toolkit' asks its social media and PR teams to do.

Charity ‘toolkit’: How Sonu Sood’s foundation sought help from BJP’s Tejasvi Surya but took all the credit himself

Netizens have often raised suspicions that Sonu Sood had been falsely claiming credit for arranging help for Covid-19 patients without having done so.

‘This is your blessing’: INMAS director whose team developed 2-DG drug thanks his physics teacher Rajnath Singh

Dr AK Mishra, the director of INMAS, stated that Raksha Mantri Rajnath Singh was his physics lecturer back in the 1980s.

Recently Popular

Odisha: Sonu Sood clarifies after Ganjam DM says they had not received any communication from him regarding bed for COVID patient

The Collector and District Magistrate of Ganjam has called out Sonu Sood after the actor claimed to have arranged a bed.

Pakistan based CNN contributor Adeel Raja says world needs another Hitler amidst Israel-Palestine conflict, has history of anti-Semitic tweets

Adeel Raja, freelance contributor at CNN, has said that the world needs a Hitler today amidst the Israel-Palestine conflict.

Vinod Dua’s daughter, who wanted all ‘bhakts’ dead, receives help from a ‘bhakt’ MP while her mother needed critical COVID medicines

BJP supporters lodged their protest about minister chipping in to help the elites in India, when commoners are equally suffering, especially when the elites have not asked for their help.

Haryana: Police rules out communal angle in murder of Mewat youth Asif, two groups are old political rivals. Details

As per police, Asif had beaten up Pradeep's group members 20 days back, and Pradeep decided to avenge the attack.

Assam: Six arrested for disrespecting national flag, accused caught using tricolour as table cloth for Eid feast

An image of Rejina Parvin Sultana, a resident of Assam's Tengnamari village, feasting lunch with her family on the occasion of Eid had gone viral on the internet.

UAE warns Hamas, asks to keep ‘calm’ or lose funding for infrastructure projects in Gaza

Last year, the United States under the Donald Trump administration has helped to broker a peace deal between UAE and Israel in the form of 'Abraham Accords.'
- Advertisement -

 

Connect with us

255,255FansLike
545,505FollowersFollow
24,300SubscribersSubscribe