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Ignore the media, Congress and Rahul Gandhi have nothing to worry post Verdict 2016

It is a known fact that Indian media outlets are largely compromised. So should we believe them? Many anchors are screaming hoarse that the big winners of the elections held in 5 states recently are BJP, Amma, Didi and Left in Kerala. In the same breath they trash Congress claiming it has been a big blow to Congress and that it is losing steam and that we are soon seeing a Congress Mukt Bharat.

Instead of going for Mahaul, one must stick to data. Data which is manipulated to show the version of the truth which we want to believe is true. Take a look at the irrefutable data presented by this Congress IT Cell member:

Ignore minor inaccuracies in the data such as Congress alone only won 20 odd seats in Kerala and Pandhi is showing the seats of entire Congress coalition UDF which got 51. Such minor aberrations should be overlooked and the larger picture must be seen: If all these states were one state, Congress would have been declared the winner. Don’t you see how media is manipulating you? Instead of showing you the national picture, they are breaking up India into arbitrary chunks called “states” and then declaring winners in each state!

“Independent” senior advocate Sanjay Hegde has also vetted this: Congress may have lost some points but it has won the set!

It is exactly this sort of rosy bigger picture which Congress must see. There is no apocalypse there is no need for Rahul Gandhi to take any responsibility for any defeat because this in indeed a victory!

Some dooms-day patrakaars have even declared Congress to be a regional outfit. A map of India and the states ruled by Congress is also being shared:

Congress Mukt Bharat
Congress Mukt Bharat

Is this really true? Nope. If you use an extremely convoluted weighted average system giving arbitrary weights to parties based on some notion you have just invented out of thin air, then the data, after a bit of tinkering will prove that Congress is still the best in the world. That should soothe your nerves if you are a nervous Congress supporter or a close family friend of the Gandhis:

And if all fails, you can cook up well in advance, stories that the trends in BJP’s favour are fake. Learn from this intrepid Congress IT cell worker:

Fake trends?

So Rahul Gandhi, ignore all the shouting Arnabs and anxious Barkhas, the true intellectuals and analysts are on Twitter. And their verdict is out – Congress has nothing to worry. It’s BJP that is going down. A trip to Europe in June to celebrate?

(This is a satirical take)

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