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Home Variety Satire Diary of a Delhi Liberal: Friends in Jharkhand rejoice, we have reclaimed it from...

Diary of a Delhi Liberal: Friends in Jharkhand rejoice, we have reclaimed it from fascists

Fascist Modi will always remember this week diary. The week in which people firmly rejected his Government’s NRC proposal, which is yet to be drafted.

Dear Diary,

What a mind-blowing week diary, what a mind-blowing week. The fascist forces are quaking in their boots after the mass uprising that shook the roots of their evil dictatorship. The streets of Delhi were on fire, Lucknow was more stoned than a South Bombay person at NH weekender, Trains in Bengal were hammered more than the hammering that Kuldeep Yadav got against Pollard, it was beautiful.

The fascist idea of giving fast-track citizenship to refugees has been opposed tooth and nail by our comrades, and with a united country opposing it, it doesn’t look like the government will be able to implement this law. There were rallies by Bollywood, there were mass protests by Jamia Millia students on the roads of Delhi, by students who were all studying in the library at the same time, Policemen were beaten on the roads of Ahmedabad, it was just beautiful.

Read: When anti-CAA protesters claim architects of Moplah massacre as ‘freedom fighters’, it’s clear that they want “Hinduon Se Azadi”

There were historic sacrifices being made everywhere. Ramchandra Guha, the modern-day Mahatma Gandhi, had to tell his name to someone. Medha Patkar, modern-day Sarojini Naidu, had to smile at Pakistani Hindu refugees. Rahul Gandhi, modern-day King Edward The First, had to….. sorry, he didn’t do anything, which is a sacrifice in itself because he didn’t want to take way the spotlight from other revolutionaries.

Of course every revolution extracts a cost diary, and so did this one. We had to cancel a dinner at Civil House in Khan Market because our driver got arrested while practicing Shot Put in Seelampur, but we knew it beforehand that we will need to make tough choices to bring about this revolution. There were some deaths in UP and Mangaluru as well but UP has far too many people anyway and what is Mangaluru, is it a real place or just people mispronouncing Bengaluru?

Read: Why anti-CAA riots have affected me so much: A personal testimony

Fascist Modi will always remember this week diary. The week in which people firmly rejected his Government’s NRC proposal, which is yet to be drafted.

The good news didn’t just come from the streets, it also came from the polling booths diary. Our secular parties have won Jharkhand and we can finally bring democracy to the state. As you know diary, Jharkhand is a very important state for us because of all our friends living there. Something tells me, we will get a farmhouse near Ranchi now, to help the tribals obviously.

In personal news diary, reached New York yesterday for our vacation. Such an energetic city, always on the move, no bandhs, no crowds blocking the roads, no burning buses, absolutely love it. Wish Delhi was more like this. Anyway, that’s enough for this week from me diary, hope the street protests in Delhi continue and we force Modi to go back to that evil state Gujarat.

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Liberals of Delhi
Bullshitting sitting in Lutyens Delhi.

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