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‘Illiterate ignorant masses being misled by some so-called leaders on CAA’: Bar Council of India appeals to people to maintain peace and harmony

OpIndia Staff
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‘Illiterate ignorant masses being misled by some so-called leaders on CAA’: Bar Council of India appeals to people to maintain peace and harmony

The Bar Council of India has appealed to the people of the country to maintain peace and harmony, in the wake of widespread violence that is happening in several parts of the country in the name of ani-CAA protests. The Bar Council passed a resolution in this regard in a meeting held today, after which they issued a press release.

The Council makes a very significant statement by saying that people and the illiterate ignorant mass are being misled by some so-called leaders with regard to the Citizenship Amendment Act. They have said that the matter is under consideration of the Supreme Court, therefore everyone should await the decision of Apex Court, adding that people have immense faith on the Supreme Court.

Bar Council of India

The Bar Council appealed the people to disapprove provocative speeches by political leaders, and said that damage of public property and attack on the police or defence personnel are very serious issues.

 

Jharkhand Assembly Elections: Tough match for BJP, don’t be surprised if CM loses, says political analyst Pradip Bhandari

OpIndia Staff
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Jharkhand Assembly Elections: Tough match for BJP, don’t be surprised if CM loses, says political analyst Pradip Bhandari

As a politically charged year comes to an end, Jharkhand Assembly Elections will be declared tomorrow and the BJP government in state faces a tough time as the BJP may not register this one win to end the year on a high note. Political analyst and Jan Ki Baat CEO Pradip Bhandari, while speaking to OpIndia said that anti-incumbency may be the major factor in this.

“Anti-incumbency in the state is the main factor. Don’t be surprised if even the chief minister loses or wins with a very less margin,” said Bhandari. As per Jan Ki Baat survey, the BJP may win between 22 to 30 seats whereas Jharkhand Mukti Morcha and the allies including Congress may get anything between 46 to 37 seats. Congress itself is expected to win between 10 to 15 seats in Jharkhand.

India Today-Axis exit poll too predicted a victory for the JMM-Congress-RJD alliance. ABP News-C Voter has suggested that in case of a hung assembly, the opposition alliance may have slightly favourable circumstances to form government.

Jharkhand Assembly elections, which were held in five phases, concluded on 20th December. For the 81 seat Assembly, 41 is the half-way mark. The results will be declared on 23rd December, 2019.

Anti-CAA protests: Aligarh Muslim University students ‘expel’ Vice Chancellor, Registrar

OpIndia Staff
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Anti-CAA protests: Aligarh Muslim University students ‘expel’ Vice Chancellor, Registrar

In a bizarre move, the students of controversial Aligarh Muslim University have expelled their Vice-Chancellor and the Registrar of the university. The students have asked them to vacate their official residences by January 5, 2020.

According to the reports, in a letter addressed to the Vice-Chancellor Tariq Mansoor and Registrar Abdul Hamid, the office of the students at the university have asked the duo to vacate their places before January 5, 2020. The notice has been allegedly signed by the ‘students’ of the Aligarh Muslim University, the teachers and the non-teaching staff of the university.

“If the Vice-Chancellor and the Registrar do not vacate their places on or before the said date, the students, teachers and the non-teaching staff would boycott the university administration until they resign and vacate their places,” reads the notice.

The students have also closed down all activity in the university until the VC and the Registrar resigns.

Students of AMU expels VC, Registrar

Earlier, the students and Muslim mob associated with the Aligarh Muslim University (AMU)  had unleashed violent protests against the Citizenship Amendment Act. The ‘students’ of AMU had clashed with UP Police on December 15. The police have stated that AMU students had gathered at the university campus and attacked the police officials injuring at least 6-17 policemen. The police had to fire tear gas shells.

Rana Ayyub sensationalises Muzaffarnagar anti-CAA riots, alleges RSS members of attacking Muslims, UP Police calls her bluff

OpIndia Staff
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Rana Ayyub sensationalises Muzaffarnagar anti-CAA riots, alleges RSS members of attacking Muslims, UP Police calls her bluff

The Uttar Pradesh Police today called out sensationalist Rana Ayyub’s bluff over the situation in Muzaffarnagar. Earlier today, Ayyub, in her inimitable style had tweeted that she is getting ‘heartbreaking calls from Muzaffarnagar and Kanpur.


She said that local people she talked to are saying that RSS members along with police and local leaders are attacking Muslim localities. She alleged that cars and houses are being burnt. “Remember the initial days of Gujarat 2002,” she tried to sensationalise. In 2002, 59 Hindus were burnt alive in Sabarmati Express coach in Godhra. The ones who died were karsevaks, returning from Ayodhya.


She then questioned PM Modi for holding a rally in Delhi. Joining her in this was one Harun Riaz.


However, calling out her bluff, the Uttar Pradesh Police denied the allegations.


Further, asking her to act responsibly, UP Police asked her to share verifiable evidence of what she was claiming so that the police could look into the matter.

Read: Showing complete disregard for law of the land, ‘journalist’ Rana Ayyub illegally smuggles a foreign journalist in Kashmir for New Yorker article

Smouldering over her lies being called out, Ayyub then tried to obfuscate the matter by saying how such denial can come only from the UP Police.


Not taking things lying down, the UP Police further asked her for specific proof instead of using metaphors.


The UP Police also reminded Ayyub that as per her own timeline, a police chowki and several vehicles were torched by a mob.

PM Modi calls out opposition propaganda on CAA and NRC, here are the key takeaways from his Ramlila Maidan rally speech

OpIndia Staff
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PM Modi calls out opposition propaganda on CAA and NRC, here are the key takeaways from his Ramlila Maidan rally speech

On Sunday, with slogans of “Vividhta mein ekta bharat ki visheshta” (unity in diversity is India’s unique identity), PM Narendra Modi sounded the poll bugle for battleground Delhi from the Ramlila Maidan.

Addressing a huge gathering at Ramlila Maidan, Prime Minister Modi said that he saw the enthusiasm of the people of Delhi. PM Modi said his government brought happiness in the lives of 40 lakh people of Delhi.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyRkPOBnvpo?start=2271]

As Modi government granted ownership titles to people living in unauthorised colonies in Delhi, he said, “Even after several decades after Independence, a large section of the population in Delhi had to face fear, uncertainty, deceit and false electoral promises. Illegal, sealing, bulldozer and a cut-off date – the life of a large population in Delhi was confined around these words”.

PM Narendra Modi added that the people should know what was Delhi government doing all along. PM Modi accused AAP government of illegally giving 2000 lavish bungalows to some rich people.

Launching an attack on AAP’s Delhi government over the issue of delaying major infrastructure works, PM Modi said, “Had the Delhi govt not politicised the phase 4 project of Delhi metro, its work would have started much earlier. That is why I say that those who do politics in your name, never understood your pain, they never intended to do that”.

Prime Minister Modi also raised the issue of drinking water in Delhi, and attacked the AAP government by saying that they are misleading people by saying that water in Delhi is drinkable.

Amidst the ongoing debate over the Citizenship Amendment Act, PM Modi clarified in detail regarding the provision of the act and slammed the opposition parties and anti-India forces for misleading people by resorting to false propaganda against the amendment

“In the last session of parliament, we passed the Citizenship Amendment Bil. Lok Sabha and Rajya Sabha have passed the bill, the people should respect the parliament, they should respect the mandate of the people,” said PM Modi.

PM Modi attacked Delhi Deputy CM Manish Sisodia for peddling fake news by alleging that Delhi cops had set buses on fire. “Fake news and misinformation regarding the CAA are being spread to instigate people. For their own politics, you have seen what they have done last week, the way they have incited crowd, the way they have shared fake videos to create a narrative and spew venom,” PM Modi asserted.

Continuing his attack on opposition parties, especially the Congress party, PM Modi said that political parties are spreading rumours, misleading people and inciting them to go against the government. “I want to ask them when we authorised the unauthorised colonies, did we ask anyone their religion? Did we ask which political party they support? Did we ask for documents from 1970, 1980?” asked PM Modi.

Clarifying the details of the CAA, PM Modi said the BJP government never put the restriction of paperwork when it provided welfare schemes to the poor.

Launching a scathing attack on the violent protests against the CAA, PM Modi said public properties were set on fire due to fear-mongering. He urged the opposition parties to attack him instead of attacking poor men. “Hate me but don’t hate India. Burn my effigies but don’t burn a poor man’s auto-rickshaw,” said Modi.

Prime Minister Narendra Modi said the attack on police is not justified because police are always there to help the common people. “33,000 police personnel sacrificed their lives for peace and security in-country, since independence. Today, you are brutally thrashing them. When any problem arises, police don’t ask your religion or caste, whatever the weather or time they are there to help you,” said PM Modi.

Referring to anti-CAA protests which have erupted across the country, PM Modi said that the rumour mongers need to be identified and punished. Taking a dig at AAP, Modi said no appeal was made for peace from the seven-year-old party and accused the party of sponsoring the violence indirectly.

Allaying the fears of Muslims over the CAA, PM Modi said, “Muslims being misled, I have always ensured that documents will never come in way of development schemes and their beneficiaries, the Muslims of India do not need to worry at all. The CAA and the NRC will not apply to the Muslims of the country. It’s a white lie,” PM Modi said. The Prime Minister added, “It is shocking to see the kind of lies that are being spread. Some people are even saying that the CAA is against the poor people of the country”.

Exposing the urban Naxals and the “liberal-secular” media, PM Modi added that some educated luminaries were spreading such atrocious lies that Muslims will be sent to detention centres. “How absurd is this?” asked Modi.

Continuing his attack on the anti-India brigade, PM Modi demanded, “Have some respect for ur education. At least read the NRC document. Don’t believe this country-destroying-lies spread by Congress and their supporters”.

“CAA is not for any citizen of this country. There has been misinformation about NRC. Congress and urban Naxals are spreading the rumour. They are lying that Muslims will be sent to detention centres,” said PM Modi.

Further, Prime Minister in a sly against self-proclaimed Dalit leaders of the country said, they have fallen into the narrative trap of Congress and misleading supporters. The Dalit leaders should be aware that those Hindu refugees who have fled from Pakistan are mostly Dalit and are treated as subhumans in Pak from where they fled to our country, said Modi.

“We had a chance to expose Pakistan’s discrimination against minorities but it was lost due to our rivals’ politics,” he said.

“Infiltrators never come in light. They never ask for help from the police, never give interviews and just hide. They live via corrupt means through agents. Refugees never hide their identities and infiltrators never reveal themselves,” said PM Modi while defending his rationale for the passing of CAA.

“Who understands the pain of refugees better than people of Delhi? Citizenship Act is not taking away anyone’s citizenship. It, in fact, provides citizenship to the religiously persecuted minorities from Pakistan, Afghanistan and Bangladesh”.

He added, “Two weeks ago, a daughter was born at Majnu-ka-Tila (the refugee colony for persecuted Hindus from Pakistan) who was named ‘nagarikta’. I want to ask miscreants & people engaged in remote control politics if lives of ‘nagarikta’ and her parents become easy if the problem of any citizen of the country is solved, why does it pain you?”

Invoking Mahatma Gandhi, PM Modi said Gandhi had said that the Sikhs and Hindus living in Pakistan will always be welcome in India. He added that the CAA was in line with the promise the Government of India made in 1947. Now that we’re fulfilling the decades-old promise, why are they protesting against it, asked PM Modi at Ramlila Maidan.

Attacking West Bengal Chief Minister Mamata Banerjee, who had threatened to go to United Nations to seek intervention in India’s internal affairs, PM Modi said, “Mamata didi went from Kolkata to United Nations. A few years back, she was pleading before Parliament that infiltrators coming from Bangladesh should be stopped. Didi, what has happened to you? Why did you change? Why are you spreading rumours? Elections come and go. Why are you scared?”

Prime Minister slammed the opposition parties and said that by spreading rumours about the CAA and NRC they are doing vote-bank politics. “They supported Article 370 but oppose CAA,” he added.

Prime Minister Narendra Modi said that during the tenure of his government, India’s relationship with Gulf countries has improved. Muslim countries released many Indian prisoners, Saudi increased Hajj quota. However, Prime Minister Modi asserted that Congress and its allies cannot digest India’s growing ties with the Muslim world.

PM Modi also said that he will do everything for peace, the security of the nation.

Prime Minister Narendra Modi urged the people of Delhi to launch a mass cleanliness drive before the year ends. He said that we should welcome the new year with a cleaner Delhi.

Badminton player Saina Nehwal appreciates PM Modi’s Ramlila Maidan speech, ‘liberals’ descend upon her timeline to abuse her

OpIndia Staff
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Badminton player Saina Nehwal appreciates PM Modi’s Ramlila Maidan speech, ‘liberals’ descend upon her timeline to abuse her

Badminton player and Olympic athlete Saina Nehwal did what celebrities are not supposed to do if they want to ‘liberal’ credentials. She appreciated Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s Ramlila Maidan speech in Delhi today and called it ‘thought provoking’.


Sacrilege!

No sooner did she tweet, trolls masquerading as ‘liberals’ descended upon her timeline to call her a BJP IT cell member.


And then of course, everyone became orthopaedic experts and questioned her future as an athlete ‘without a spine’.


Of course, unless you toe the ‘secular-liberal’ line, you are a disgrace.


Trolls have now found a new way to shame someone who supports PM Modi. Within minutes of Nehwal’s tweet, a few random accounts, presumably bots, copy-pasted her tweet. The trolls invoked the ACP Pradyuman inside them and accused her of being part of “BJP IT Cell”.


Senior Congress leaders also joined in in trolling Nehwal.


If you are a celebrity in India, it is like a crime to not toe the line of the ‘secular-liberal’ mafia.

CAA has nothing unconstitutional, it does not deny any person belonging to any religion or nation the opportunity to get Indian citizenship

Shriya Gune
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CAA has nothing unconstitutional, it does not deny any person belonging to any religion or nation the opportunity to get Indian citizenship

The Modi government recently came up with the Citizenship Amendment Bill that was passed by both houses of parliament and became The Citizenship Amendment Act, 2019 after receiving the President’s assent. The act invoked criticism and protests throughout the country and people are coming out on streets to oppose the passing of this act.

In this context, there’s an interesting story… In a mohalla somewhere in a town in India, there were two brothers and their wives staying together in one household in that mohalla. One of the couples had two daughters and decided to give one in adoption to the other couple. The condition for adoption was that the daughter should be raised well and get all the opportunities that her sister would get. Both couples started living separately with their respective daughters. The daughter given in adoption started facing harassment and torture by her adoptive parents, they starved her, did not send her to school and kept on taunting and beating her. Her natural parents came to know about her condition and decided that they would take her back with them. As soon as they decided to bring her back, people from their mohalla started asking why are they not allowing tortured children from other families to live with them. People started protesting and shouting that this is injustice and that taking their daughter back with them was injustice towards all tortured children in the mohalla.

You must be thinking, how absurd this demand is. The protesters coming out on streets to oppose the Citizenship Amendment Act have a similar absurd argument against the act. The Act amends the Citizenship Act, 1955 to allow Hindus, Sikhs, Jains, Christians, Buddhists and Parsis from Pakistan, Bangladesh, Afghanistan to obtain Indian citizenship easily. There are different ways prescribed under the Act of 1955, for becoming an Indian citizen. One of which is citizenship by naturalisation.

Read- How to debate Citizenship Amendment Act with ‘liberal’ idiots

A person can be eligible to apply for citizenship by naturalisation if he fulfils all the necessary qualifications provided in schedule 3 of the Act. The most important qualification is that he must have stayed in India for an aggregate minimum period of 11 years. The amendment act relaxes this criterion for the people belonging to above-mentioned 6 religions coming from the above listed 3 countries and brings it down to 5 years minimum aggregate stay in India. The Amendment Act also excludes these people from the definition of ‘illegal migrant’ for the purposes of this act. The cut-off date prescribed for these persons to have entered in India is 31st of December 2014.

To put it simply, any person staying in India for minimum 11 years and fulfilling other necessary qualifications can apply for citizenship by naturalisation. The Amendment Act only makes it a little easier for minorities from these 3 neighbouring countries to become Indian citizens. So, the Amendment Act does not take away any person’s right to apply for Indian citizenship, whatsoever may be his religion, race, caste, gender or place of birth. It merely makes a special provision for some people. And while doing so it does not in any way violate the mandate of Article 14 of the constitution.

Article 14 guarantees all persons’ right to equality before the law and equal protection of the laws within the territory of India. This guarantee does not envision or intends absolute mathematical equality. It allows the state to make reasonable classifications. The state can make special laws for a specified group of people. The only requirement is that this classification and the object behind it has to have reasonable Nexus. The CAA intends to protect the people who were persecuted on religious grounds in our 3 neighbouring countries.

Read- From ‘we want Lalu out of jail’ to ‘CAA is a machine that produces Indian citizens’: Read bizarre reasons why RJD supporters are protesting

It is a historic fact that this sub-continent was once one nation and Hinduism and the religions born out of Hinduism originated and grew in this sub-continent. Partition on religious grounds was a historic undeniable fact too. It was the hope that both countries will treat all their people equally and ensure their dignity. While in India the population of religious minorities is on a continuous rise, the population of minorities in Pakistan and Bangladesh witnessed a drastic fall since 1947.

The population of a specific group of people in a country does not fall such drastically without any reason and the reason, in this case, is the systematic persecution of these minorities by these Islamic states. These persecuted, tortured people in order to survive, kept fleeing to India. When persecuted people flee, they don’t cross seven oceans, they find the nearest safe place. And India is not just the nearest safe place for these minorities but also the place where their roots are. The promises made at the time of partition oblige us to open our doors for these people and give them equal rights as other Indian citizens.

A defined territory and a defined population are prerequisites of a sovereign nation. And a democratically elected government of the sovereign nation has all the right to decide within the constitutional framework, upon citizenship of the nation. The CAA perfectly fits into our constitutional philosophy and framework. We are not in any way denying any person belonging to any religion or nation, the opportunity to get Indian citizenship. We are simply offering added protection to a class of people. Why not provide the same to Rohingyas from Myanmar and to Shias from Pakistan is as absurd an argument as the one asking the couple to bring home all tortured children from their mohalla. Law strikes where the need is the greatest and it was high time that our lawmakers realised the need for bringing in this law.

Anti-CAA protests: Gujarat Congress leader Umar Khan Pathan arrested by police for inciting mob through fake videos

OpIndia Staff
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Anti-CAA protests: Gujarat Congress leader Umar Khan Pathan arrested by police for inciting mob through fake videos

The crime branch of Ahmedabad police has nabbed a Congress leader for posting a fake and misleading video on social media which incited a Muslim mob during a protest march at Shah-e-Alam, Gujarat, where several police officials were brutally attacked by Muslim mobs.

According to the reports, Congress party’s minority cell member Umar Khan Pathan had shared a video on social media in which a police action against rioters from Lucknow was passed on as an incident in Ahmedabad stoking violence in the Shah-e-Alam. The fake news had unleashed a violent Muslim mob, who attacked and injured more than 25 policemen on duty.

Earlier, the role of Congress party had emerged in the horrifying violent protest against NRC and CAA that broke out in the Shah-e-Alam area in Ahmedabad and in Palanpur, Gujarat.

Read: Take revenge, don’t spare any cop: Congress Corporator Shehzad Khan Pathan instigated anti-CAA riots in Ahmedabad

Ajay Thomar, Special Police Commissioner today said that the cyber police had lodged a case in this connection and also issued an advisory to the social media clarifying the case. He confirmed that Congress leader Umar Khan Pathan has been arrested for deliberate attempt to misinform and mislead people.

On Friday, several people have been detained by the Ahmedabad police including Congress Corporator Shehzad Khan Pathan. At least 24 people have been detained for the Ahmedabad violence by a Muslim mob including the Congress Corporator.

In Shah-e-Alam, the Muslim mob had gone on a rampage and indulged in indiscriminate stone-pelting against the police personnel. In shocking visuals that had emerged, while the mob indulged in stone-pelting on the police, a part of the Muslim mob had also tried to lynch a policeman who had stumbled while running from the frenzied mob throwing stones.

‘Why have you lost faith in the people of Bengal? Why do you consider them your enemy?’ PM Modi takes on Mamata Banerjee at Delhi rally

OpIndia Staff
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‘Why have you lost faith in the people of Bengal? Why do you consider them your enemy?’ PM Modi takes on Mamata Banerjee at Delhi rally

Narendra Modi addressed a massive rally at Ramlila Maidan in Delhi today where he addressed the Citizenship Amendment Act and the ongoing protests against it. In the rally, he attacked the opposition specifically for supporting the said protests. Mamata Banerjee, the Chief Minister of West Bengal, was one of the politicians who found mention in the Prime Minister’s speech today.


Contrary to Mamata Banerjee, who always appears consumed by rage when she speaks of the Prime Minister, Narendra Modi mocked the Chief Minister of Bengal for her opposition to the CAA. Narendra Modi said, “She earlier wanted the government to stop illegal immigration from Bangladesh, she also wanted to help Hindu refugees from Bangladesh. What has happened to you now? Once the Army was doing a regular drill in Bengal. Didi claimed Modi’s Sena had invaded Bengal.”

Read: Going mental on Modi didn’t help Kejriwal, will it help Mamata or Rahul?

He also said, “Why have you changed your position now? Why are you spreading rumours? Elections come and go, why are you so scared? Trust the people of Bengal, why have you lost faith in them? Why do you consider the people of Bengal your enemies?”

Mamata Banerjee has been opposing the CAA and the proposed NRC strongly. West Bengal has also seen great violence in the aftermath of the passage of the CAA in both houses of the Parliament. The Chief Minister of West Bengal has also taken to raising unconventional slogans during her rallies opposing the CAA, the most prominent among which goes something like “Kaa Kaa Chi Chi, CHi Chi Chi Chi.”

JNU research scholar finds out the secret plan of Modi-Shah around NRC

Guest Author
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JNU research scholar finds out the secret plan of Modi-Shah around NRC

And finally, we figured it out. The cat is out of the bag. We have unearthed the wicked conspiracy of the Brahminical duo of Modi-Shah to disenfranchise Indian Muslims via NRC. Yeah yeah, I know that Modi isn’t a Brahmin. But here, I mean it metaphorically. This hegemony of facts suits the plebian readers of Swarajya or Opindia. In an intellectual society, the emotional construct behind the secular fabric of India trumps over the bourgeoise concepts of logic and reason. “Down with reason”, as we often say at AISA. The luxury of artificial social constructs like logic are meant for the privileged few. What about the members of SFI and AISA?

Coming back to the point, I feel compelled to share this investigation that my friends from JNU and I, a veteran PhD scholar in ‘Medieval Art History of Uganda’ at JNU have come up with. I have seen generations of students come to JNU, wanting a membership into our intellectual society, wanting to be a part of our nightly investigation sessions, only to fail miserably in our tough standards, and eventually deciding to become corporate slaves. The engineering students are the worst. They just don’t have the taste for the abstract humanism. Always worried about precision and nonsense like that. But we, Ajit, Shonali and I, still have kept the intellectual society going. For nearly three decades.

As our ritual, we meet every night to enjoy the scent of lightly burning organic, home-grown, dried leaves of a particular plant that we roll into a thin paper. The scent helps us achieve a transcendental state of mind where the material world around us ceases to matter. In that state, we often gaze into the future of India ruled by our revolutionary brethren. While the dream is yet to come to fruition—one day it will—yesterday was special. We were taken to the future, deep into the nefarious designs of Modi-Shah to banish the innocent Muslims—which is all the Muslims—out of this country. We could see it through our eyes, and here, we share it with you.

How will CAA+NRC make Indian Muslims stateless, you must have wondered? Here is what we saw. We are in January 2021. An NRC begins. Government officials are instructed to go through the country with a special biometric collection device. Each individual, Hindu or Muslim, gives his fingerprint along with their documents. NRC happens very smoothly. Not one person is actually rejected. Everyone is told that their documentation is correct and they are now Indian citizens. They can enjoy all the rights and so on.

Read: Modi government dispels myths about NRC: Here are 13 FAQs and their answers published by the govt

The game is elsewhere. It happens after NRC.

We are in December 2021. The list of all the citizens in this country is already prepared. It is stored in a supercomputer at 7 Race Course Road, the place where the fascist not-my-prime-minister lives. On one cold night in Delhi, Modi and Shah enter the room. They have announced that they will be inaccessible for three days. Everyone around thinks that they must be out on some very important mission, on some secret task of securing India—an artificial nation-state in the first place, but let that be. But, here they are, in that room.

They turn the computer on. They are prompted for a password. Of course, it is “HinduRashtra2002”. They are in. They open Microsoft Excel—another capitalist invention of the twentieth century that discriminates against the numerically differently-abled intellectuals.

And there it is. The list of all the citizens of India. Modi-Shah start from the top, the president. And scan for any Muslim name. 1.3 billion people! They go through them all, day and night, three nights non-stop. Sleepless. Almost like how some of our comrades write PhD theses in Sociology at JNU when the draconian administration tramples upon their Right-to-indefinite-stay-in-hostels, and after the UPSC commission’s oppressive examinations reject them for years.

And then, at the end of the three nights, the mission is accomplished!

Every single Muslim except Shami Mohammad is deleted, and he too will be if he stops taking wickets, said Shah to Modi. Here is what actually happened.

When the biometrics were collected, the device actually had a special system wherein a chip would be installed in a person’s finger that they wouldn’t know about. The chip had a kill trigger developed by another Brahminical organization, ISRO. By sending the right command, the chip would instantly kill a person by poisoning him.

That is what Modi-Shah did. The special excel sheet in the supercomputer had this function. Whenever you delete an entry for a person, the person would be deleted in reality. Not just that, the chip would do so in a matter that the person would instantly evaporate. No trace left. As Kevin Spacey says in The Usual Suspect, “And like that, he’s gone”. Vanished!

At the end of the third night, the duo gets up, wink at each other. Shah presents a bouquet to Modi as a gesture of their achievement. And they leave the room.

Anybody from the media or any other organization that questioned the sudden disappearance of Muslims would also be deleted. A few journalists did try to raise their voice and they too disappeared “mysteriously”. Nobody ever questioned them after that.

We wanted to look more into the future of how far did Modi-Shah go. But, the trance induced by dried leaves has its limits. The effects started wearing off, and slowly, we were brought back to the drudgeries of the world around us. But, what we saw sent chills down our spine.

Must one wait till all of this happens? Of course not, get up and protest! I am about to leave for one too, near Jantar Mantar. A friend told me that quite a few attractive women attend these protests. So perhaps I need to succumb to the artificially laid out standards of aestheticism by taking a shower today. Down with the hegemony of cleanliness…

(The author is a dara-hua-conservative who tweets by the handle @chunandan)

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